about a young boy who had died on christmas day. he was happy, and he had a great smile. i couldnt stop noticing how nice and white and straight his teeth were, to go with that smile. im not going to mention his name, as he is not mine to mourn, i dont think. but that does not mean i am not affected by his death, by his video he has given me strength. some of these reasons should not make me feel so and for that i am guilty. but he has given me a little more strength and hope for this world. which is odd. i am a christian, i do believe in god. and right now i see him as a looker and a guider, to guide me through my life and right now i do not worship him out of fear. deep breath. i do things in my life for me, and i try to soak it all in and remember all of it, and take it to my death bed. i am ashamed to say i have wasted many hours, days in my lifetime but for my new year i am going to try and reduce that. and do something that scares me completely everyday. i hope by this some people know where i am coming from, and that others will do the same.

yours and yours only.